Tuesday, January 12, 2010

Feeling lost and

Trying to find my way.  Have you ever felt like everyone and everything around you is moving so fast that you can't seem to keep up?  I am feeling like that now.  I have even found myself not getting my "alone" time with God.  Now that I realize that He has been put on the backburner, I also realize that is why things are so out of hand and chaotic.  We have had some problems in our family lately along with some very exciting things.  I have had to be a rock for the people around me and take matters into my hands. I have had to be strong when I felt very weak.  I am the shoulder people come to cry on and the one that supposedly gives good advise.  But on my end I am not feeling that way at all.  I feel beat and my world seems in such a disaster.  My home is a mess and I can't seem to get the energy to get it in order.  With a husband, a dog and 3 kids I really need to find that motivation, but I can't find it.  My weight is out of control.  Willpower?  I think I have heard that word a time or two but where do you get this willpower.  Some say within.  I have looked there and I don;t seem to carry this mysterious "willpower".  I want it and I need it but I do not have it.  My health is becoming an issue.  For years I put myself off.  A toothache or a pain here or there, I tell myself it can wait.  Well, I have waited to long. My must everything seem so difficult?  Why does it all seem out of reach?  Am I happy? Yes!  Just feeling overwelmed and discouraged.  I look around at friends and family and I wonder "How do they do it?" How can they keep up with everyone and everything. How do they keep the house up, cook meals and look so put together and accomplish the extras that life gives us? I guess to find this answer I have to look to the Lord. My journey will include self transformation physically and mentally. I will learn to be a better wife, mother daughter and friend. I will learn what it takes to accomplish the tasks that need accomplishing. I will find that time each day to set aside for my alone time with God.

Let my journey begin!

Iaiah 40:31

But those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.


  1. I see you making changes, and I believe your insight into your family circle and the role you are playing is very good. People come to you because you have established yourself to be a very wise, loving, kind and generous spirit. I appreciate and love you more than you will every know.

  2. It sounds like you are a very strong person for your family, that is awesome, but that can also be very draining, emotionally and spiritually!! Us moms tend to put everything and everyone before ourselves and that can be good but that can also be very bad, you have to find a balance that will work for you and your family, it is not easy and it is for sure something I myself struggle with on a daily basis. I will pray that you can find that balance. I know that when I'm healthy spiritually, emotionally and physically, I am without a doubt a better wife, mom, daughter, sister etc.
    Love your blog and I'm excited you've joined the world of blogging!!

  3. Thanks so much, prayers are greatly appreciated and I will work towards a healthier place in my life. I must learn to put myself first SOME of the time.